Thursday, May 10, 2007
I hate un-secret secretive secrets.
I don't like this feeling.. finding out from friends that another friend is doing something that she apparently feels uncomfortable talking to me about (because it is creating work for herself in an area where I have created work for myself)... because, by not bringing it up with me herself, it feels like she is putting my friends in a position of having to guard their words when they are talking to me.
Is this really painfully highschool, or is it reasonable that two adults are going through this? (or that this one particular adult, ME, is reacting in this way to something that may or may not just be normal behaviour .. whoa, just confused myself, hold on...)
Right. So... how do I approach her, let her know that I'm uncomfortable with the 'secretive' approach, and would prefer to help her PROMOTE this income opportunity for herself? Gah, even picturing me trying to initiate this conversation, I can see myself being intimidating and making her defensive. Crap.
Help? Suggestions? Comments? Personality adjustment?
It's like taking off a bandaid, just rip that f*&ker off and if it stings for a minute...it'll pass.
Rather than bust her for being secretive and perhaps perpetuating the already-uncomfortable feelings, the whole "I know. And now you know that I know. But no, I'm not bothered, and the fact that I'm not bothered probably makes you reconsider that sneaky approach anyway, even though I didn't bust you outright" approach is always a decent option.
I feel good about it. Thanks for all the advice :)